153. Ask Lori: Promised my parents they'd stay home as they aged, but now things have changed!
I promised my parents they'd stay home and would never go into another home, but now things have changed. What do I do?
You’re not alone – many people make that promise to their loved ones, and we want to do right by them. But it’s difficult to keep a promise when you become educated about the subject and didn't have all the facts when making that promise. Everyone’s safety is most important. If your loved one had a severe stroke or suffers from dementia, these absolutely require additional help. Plus, if you’re working full time or a parent of young children, it’s a difficult and complicated situation to take on. It’s too easy to give each responsibility only a fraction of the energy it deserves when you’re burdened with so many.
Keep in mind, the stereotypes of nursing homes aren’t always true – there are many types of senior living. Assisted living can provide additional help with bathing, dressing and meals, and you can find a nice community nearby to meet your specific needs. Many senior living professionals also have a passion and calling for the role, so your loved one is often in good hands and closely monitored.
Be sure to do your research about what’s available and the type of assistance your loved one needs. Remember, the promise is less important than safety and welfare of your loved one, and it’s okay to do what’s best for everyone involved – including yourself!
Topics discussed:
-Nursing homes
-Assisted living
-Senior living options
-Accessibility at home
-Transitioning from caregiving to assisted living
-Multi-generational living
Takeaways from this episode:
-Consider your health as the caregiver and the health of your loved one. Then consider everyone’s quality of life, and ask yourself if they’re safe and getting the best possible care.
-Find out what’s happening with your loved one and the type of care they need. Then get educated about available options for providing that assistance.
-Explore the available senior living options in the area and which can meet your loved one’s specific needs.
-The average house is not set up for someone with a wheelchair. Doors aren’t wide enough, bathrooms may not be accessible, etc. This adds complexity to the prospect of at-home care.
-Ultimately it’s not about the promise you made, it’s about the welfare of everyone involved.
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Tips on Touring senior communities:
To suggest a topic, be a guest or to support the podcast, please email Lori@Loriwilliams-seniorservices.com
For more senior resources and to sign up to the newsletter, please visit:
https://www.facebook.com/LoriWilliamsSeniorServices/
https://www.instagram.com/theloriwilliams/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/theloriwilliams/
https://loriwilliams-seniorservices.com/aging-in-style-podcast/
